David Beckham Retires So What Now? Job Ideas For Our Becks To Consider!

Let's face it, out of all the hunks in the Sports World David Beckham has to be the best. Not only is he a great football player, sort of important, but when he puts on those shorts and poses for the camera he is, well, he just is!

It doesn't matter where you live, everyone knows our darling David Beckham. Whether you like football or even if you think its boring, every woman in the civilized world loves Becks.

If you prefer music, he's the gorgeous guy who married that Spice Girl. Yep, you know which Spice girl. Dark hair, always pouting. Totters around on high heels and still manages to glare at the camera.

She's married to Beckham for goodness sake! What's she got to look miserable about? If we all woke up to that laying next to us we would have a smile on our face for hours!

Where was I?

Oh yeah, now our beautiful David Beckham has retired, whats' he going to do?

Here's a few ideas that he (hopefully) may take into consideration.

Yeah I know, but bear with me! Did someone say bare? My train of thought has slipped, hold on.

Got it. Being serious now guys. David has been pushed and pummeled for years, every time he gets a strain in his leg or other regions, he has to have physiotherapy.

Now he's got to have learned a few things over that time. I could even hire him out for the day after my massage.

Mind you, the massage would take a few hours. I mean, come on, I am exercising every day now, and a lady has to have some luxuries!

We could all do with a great painter and decorator. I know I need one. My bathroom needs doing, my bedroom needs some paint, and, well, I could go on.

I love to sit and watch decorators, don't you? A cup of coffee, feet up and just watching the movement of the guy painting the wall..... swish, swash, sway, swagger, wiggle...

Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?

So yes, what do you think?

Would our David make a great decorator? Yup. I think so too!

Hey Doctor, can you feel my heart beating? You can? Not surprised, I expect the guy in Sainsbury's can, he's only five miles up the road!

Take my temperature? Is that a good idea, I mean for goodness sake it must be at least 150 degrees by now and counting......!

Yes I can see it now. I am just nipping down to the old Doctors, to get my blood pressure done. Maybe I need to sort out my back while I'm there. Oh, and then there was that problem with....well, you can guess!

So, would David make a great Doctor?

I don't know about you, but my bushes need trimming. What? Who said what? I am talking about the gardening!

I think I need a new gardener. The weeds are attacking my lawn. The grass is up to my knees and my God its hot. Too hot for me to get out that darn lawn mower.

Maybe, just maybe I can get David Beckham to cut the grass and trim the...well, you get the idea. He would have to take off his shirt. I mean, its hot for goodness sake, and don't forget those shorts. yes, those shorts!

So, would our Becks make a great gardener? Yup, I seriously think so!

They say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach. Well, its the same for women too. Imagine coming home from a hard days work to find David Beckham in your kitchen. Can't get better than that.

Whether he makes Pizza or even good old barbeque beef, it really doesn't matter. Just sit there waiting for him to serve up at the table. Get out the bottle of wine and invite the Chef to eat with you.

I hear he does a great job cooking hot dogs!

• James Bond. Oh Oh heaven, er, seven!
• Prime Minister. He has the charisma, and I bet he would get more votes than Cameron.
• Britain's Ambassador, for, well, everything!
• Music teacher, he could teach Posh Spice to sing!
• TV presenter. Doesn't matter what David Beckham does on TV, we are all guaranteed to watch it!
• And last but not least, Male model. Yes I know he does his bit now, but hey come on, more please!